Surviving the Side Hustle

From Corporate Life to Mindset Mentor: Heather's Journey to Empowering High Performers and Achieving Sustainable Success

• Coach Rob • Season 1 • Episode 72

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Unlock the secrets of personal growth and entrepreneurial success with Heather, an inspiring mindset coach, podcast host, and author. Discover how she transitioned from corporate life to a mission of empowering high performers, using the transformative power of mindset. Heather shares how leveraging insights from neuroscience and ancient wisdom can help overcome those all-too-common feelings of being stuck. With her practical guidance, learn how to reprogram your mental operating system, break free from limiting beliefs, and design a life filled with intention and mindfulness.

Embark on a journey through the intricate landscape of mindset mastery, where perseverance meets passion. Heather introduces the concept of the Reticular Activating System (RAS), a mental filter that shapes our focus and perception, coupled with her transformative MIND morning ritual—Movement, Intention, New day gratitude, and Deciding who you want to be. Hear her insights on the importance of patience and consistency, especially in entrepreneurship, where instant success is often a mirage. Through personal anecdotes and practical advice, this episode serves as a powerful reminder that aligning your mindset with your life’s purpose is the key to achieving sustainable success.

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Speaker 1:

what's going on? Everybody today on the show, we've got heather, heather. How are you doing?

Speaker 1:

I am great, I'm so stoked to be here with you and it's nice to be on the other side of podcasting yeah, it's great to uh kind of double dip and get to like share your insights and stuff on other people's show and instead of always uh hosting everybody all the time, so why don't we kind of dive right in? I'd love to cover a couple of different things today. I'd love to dive into your story, hear a little bit about who you are, who do you help, what it is you're doing, how'd you get here? Then, from there, I'd love to dive into any kind of struggles or challenges that you might have overcome or currently are working through, and then wrap up with a few secrets that you have to showing up at a high level and performing the way you do.

Speaker 2:

All right, let's get started. Where do you want to begin?

Speaker 1:

Well, let's just dive straight in with a little bit about yourself.

Speaker 2:

So I'm a mindset coach, host of the podcast Mind Over Matter and author of Take the Leap. I did the corporate thing, I did what we're conditioned to do for over a decade, and I took a leap of faith in 2017. And just, I couldn't fathom dreading Monday and cheering on Friday for the rest of my life, and so I quit. I followed an intuitive nudge, took a leap of faith, and that's brought me to today.

Speaker 1:

Nice. And so mindset coach, can you dive in a little bit on what that is exactly and who do you help specifically?

Speaker 2:

So I primarily work with entrepreneurs, business owners and high performers just individuals that have gotten some success but feel stuck. Just individuals that have gotten some success but feel stuck. I get a lot of midlife crisisers but just feel stuck financially in their relationships as a big one. Or they've just hit that plateau in business and want to get to the next level but keep hitting a wall. And the reason I call it mindset coaching is because truly and quantum physics teaches us this neuroscience, ancient wisdom your mind is the cause of every effect in your life. When you get your mindset right, the rest will follow.

Speaker 1:

Oh, I love that and, um, I know, I know you're, you've, you've got a pretty. I don't know if it's like your, your kind of slogan or saying, but I love that when I was reading um that your life you can either live by design or by default. Can you explain a little bit about that, because that sounds like something that everyone should be listening to or at least knowing themselves.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I preach it. I'm like I wish I had a neon sign and could walk around. What I mean by that is to live your life by design means to be a conscious creator. It's simply being mindful and intentional, where most people live by default in autopilot same shit different day and then they wonder why nothing in their life changes. And truly the masses you know, like the 1%, aren't lucky. They're doing things different, which means we all have access to that to live your by design.

Speaker 1:

Where did you first come up with that?

Speaker 2:

designer. You know, that's something I I don't even know if I came across it years ago. I I'm not sure if it was in a book or what, but like it really resonated and I've never forgotten it yeah, I, I just um, I it.

Speaker 1:

it drives me insane, because I, too, work with a lot of different, uh individuals from different backgrounds, where they're uh, first come to me and they're stuck in a position or a job where they're like oh, I'm working on this thing as my side hustle, but I'm also doing this and it's like I can't leave this because I have to and I'm like dude, you, you know, it's your life. Like you can, you can do whatever it is you want to do. You might as well do something you enjoy doing.

Speaker 2:

Yeah Well, but that's where our subconscious mind comes in and and I won't get like too in depth for that today but your subconscious mind is running the show and that's 95% of literally your operating system. So think of your cell phone as you. There's nothing inherently wrong with you, but your phone's only as good as the apps installed, and many of us have limiting beliefs installed from childhood and generational trauma of financial scarcity. I literally did a video this week on. We've been programmed into fear, lack and limitation and then people wonder why we're stuck. We've been since a very young age. And think about the American dream was conditioned go to college, get a degree, climb the corporate ladder, obtain material possessions and you will be happy. I got all of that and I wasn't fulfilled.

Speaker 1:

So how do you help people overcome these limitations and these beliefs?

Speaker 2:

So it really is, and that's why I love neuroscience. Dr Joe Dispenza and Dr Bruce Lipton are big ones at this but you have to understand your operating system, your mental programming, and anywhere you're struggling and efforting for financial freedom, health and fitness relationships, anywhere you're struggling, it's because you have a conscious desire going against your belief system. That's literally all it is, and that's why change is simple. It's just not necessarily easy at first, and so what I do with my coaching clients awareness is step number one to create any change in your life, but I really help people reinvent themselves and create version so awesome because, um, I see people all the time who are working and struggling through that and the intentionality aspect about like figuring it out and then creating the right actions and following through on those actions with accountability and checking in.

Speaker 1:

I imagine you do a lot of a lot of accountability and checking in with a lot of clients, right.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and look the big thing. I see and I even get DMs. How do I get motivation? Motivation is not your problem, but people think I just need more motivation. If you lack motivation, you actually the real problem. You don't have clarity or purpose in life. You're back to autopilot. You're going through life's motions. Nobody motivates me to get out of bed in the morning and to go to the gym. Nobody motivates me to create content or do the admin tasks I have to do in business. But I have a strong why. I'm mission driven, I know what I'm doing and so motivation is intrinsic. So, for a lot of people, if your strong why is to provide for your family, that motivates you to go to work. If you really want to lose weight, maybe you found out, like you know, you have a heart problem because of obesity. Now you have a strong why to get healthy so that you don't die tomorrow, right? So, like, motivation is intrinsic when you have clarity and purpose.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I love that, but how do you like I'm like struggling with the clarity how do you, how do you help someone refine down and really look into and bring that awareness that you're talking about, because you said awareness is the first step. So how do you shine awareness on something where somebody has no idea what they're looking to do?

Speaker 2:

Well, I mean, that's why we invest in mentors and coaches right For somebody who's even a step or two ahead of you to help you. I mean, I've invested in coaches since 2016. I have a free resource on my website. It's called the life assessment. I would invite listeners to take that. It's on my website, heatherhakescom, but it literally comes down to you just taking a few minutes to.

Speaker 2:

I mean, it's self-discovery, and so where am I not happy? What's working well and what's not? What do I want to have, be, do an experience in my lifetime, and then you have to realize what's serving you. What do I want to have be, do and experience in my lifetime, and then you have to realize what's serving you. What do you have to let go? I love this saying If it's not adding to your life, subtract it. So we're not talking just people, we're talking thoughts, emotions and habits. If you are stuck in a victim mentality, life is happening to you and woe is me. I mean that is choice, but a lot of people have become addicted to that. When you take 100% responsibility for your life, you take 100% of your power back.

Speaker 1:

I got to ask you, though, because this might be a curve ball, so I'm sorry if it's a weird question, but like what about people who might not necessarily like who they are, or they don't? They don't feel comfortable spending that time with themselves and learning more about themselves. Have you ever worked with an individual who's in that kind of a situation?

Speaker 2:

Sure, a lot of people don't like who they are. A lot of people have self-hatred. And there's a question I asked my clients in the coaching process If you had a rank between a one and a 10, 10 being the highest, what would you rank your level of self-love? Most people rank at very low. We're talking a three or four. And think about it when your inner critic so the noise between your ears, your mindset and those negative narratives and those negative thoughts and beliefs and I'm not worthy and I'm not enough and I can't do this. If you don't learn how to master your mindset and to discipline your thoughts and emotions and have self-love and self-compassion, you're going to have a very miserable existence.

Speaker 1:

Are you familiar with Mel Robbins?

Speaker 2:

Yep.

Speaker 1:

So I think she introduced it to me first with the reticular activating system, with that whole looking for hearts and helping shift your focus into seeing more love. What are your thoughts on that? Is that true or is that because I haven't really done much research and I've heard her talk about it a few times?

Speaker 2:

Yeah. So it's your RAS, reticular activating system. It's at the base of your brain and just think about it. I like to think of it as like um a, a security guy at a bar. So your RAS is the filter, like what's on the invite list. Whatever you're focused on, you're going to get more up and your RAS does not accept or reject good or bad, it's just whatever you're focused on.

Speaker 2:

So I first experienced this years ago. I got my car totaled. I live in Colorado. I was going up a mountain pass and some guy T-boned me and my car got totaled. So I was working with a car broker and getting a new vehicle and at the time I decided I wanted a Chevy Trailblazer. This was a long time ago, like 10 years ago, but anyway, that's when I first learned about the RAS. All of a sudden, I swear at every stoplight were Chevy Trailblazers. And guess what? They were always there. But the fact that I'm now focused on it and it's top of mind, I'm going to see more of it. That's why the saying is, whatever you focus on expands. If you see opportunities, you'll see more opportunities. If you're focused on obstacles, you're going to experience more obstacles. That's how much power you have.

Speaker 1:

Wow and like, how do you start the focus more? Is it like you have strategies? Is it easy as like? Just what is it when people would say like positive affirmations, is that like, is it just as simple as that? Like saying positive things, that'll kind of switch your brain.

Speaker 2:

Well, and like I'm not into toxic positivity affirmations are great, but on their own they're very surface level and they won't change your life on their own, because that's just your conscious mind five percent.

Speaker 2:

But what I do is I think anybody who is quote successful always talks about a morning routine. I have boy, I've tried a bazillion. You know the 5 am club and I've tried all kinds of things, and what I want to offer listeners is take what resonates and leave the rest. Figure out what works for you. I believe less is more. So I have boiled down a morning ritual and I intentionally call it that, because look at the word routine you can derive the word rut. So we fall into ruts because it just becomes monotonous. So a morning ritual means it's a very intentional practice and I have four steps. I use the acronym MIND, clever, right.

Speaker 2:

So MIND simply means the M is movement and meditation. The first thing I do, before I get on my phone and email and get sucked back into that, I do a guided meditation. That is the first thing, because that's a very intentional practice to train my awareness, so my thoughts and my emotions. Step number two is I set an intention for the day. So, as an example, today you know on a podcast interview, I want to bring my best. The N is about blessing a new day, aka expressing gratitude Like I woke up today, and finally, d is deciding who I want to be. Again, this is keeping me top of mind and aware that I could fall unconscious and nothing's working out and have self-doubt or, through consistency and repetition, creating that confidence, the belief, and I have the strong why.

Speaker 1:

I love that. I love frameworks. It makes it easy to remember. I'm a huge acronym guy. I've got like an acronym for pretty much everything, but I've not ever heard of this mind. But I love it. I think it's great. But I love it. I think it's great I got to bring back to a little more on the attentionality, because when I'm talking about being intentional with a lot of my clients I try to bring the focus towards intentional consumption, so both like the meals, the nutrition, the things you're eating, and then also the media, so the types of content and things that you're just subconsciously absorbing, so like books, radio, music you're listening to. But specifically for, like the nutrition, how much does that have to play a role in everything that you're working with? Do you cover nutrition? Are certain foods you find better for certain things with clients, or can you talk at all on that, or is that a little too far into it?

Speaker 2:

So I am not a nutritionist or dietitian. I think you have to figure out what works best. Obviously, I eat pretty darn healthy, but not because I'm super strict. It's because that's just what tastes good and makes me feel good. I think a big one most people could take out of their system is alcohol. There's literally not one benefit, but I would never dictate or tell someone what they should be eating or doing, and even when I do, as a mindset coach, I'm just here to offer a new way of thinking and being that will change your life, but I would never force it upon you. So no, I don't. Food and nutrition is not my wheelhouse.

Speaker 1:

Okay, I just know, like nutrition, I have a background. My background is in strength and conditioning, with also nutrition, before I shifted into what my coaching is now. So I do touch on nutrition here and there. But the intentionality aspect, like making sure that whatever you're consuming you're aware of how it makes you feel, and things like that Like I'm never going to turn down some Chinese food over the weekend, but I know it makes me feel like sludge, like for the next, like six to 12 hours afterwards. And then during the week I try to eat the things that keep me feeling light, to help me keep my mind clear, so I can stay focused. Like, for me, my go-to is like some of those salad kits that are prepped with a little bit of chicken, and I feel like that helps me stay motivated, helps me feel fresh, helps me feel clear with whatever I'm working on, whatever kind of projects too. So I wasn't sure if you kind of dive into any of that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, the only thing I would add to that is I don't know if you've ever seen this meme. I saw it years ago, probably like Instagram or Pinterest. But the saying goes you can drink the alkaline water, eat organic, do yoga, but if you don't deal with the shit going on in your head and your heart, you're still unhealthy. So I think you have to understand that it's a holistic approach. Just mindset and eating junk isn't going to create that healthy, sustainable life. It's all moving pieces, but just dealing with nutrition and not dealing with the mental, emotional also makes you not healthy.

Speaker 1:

So your first letter for your morning acronym, uh, mine, that was movement and meditation. Right, you have like a particular uh thing, that what works best for you in terms of of the movement aspect, and then then the meditation, if you don't mind sharing I'm a gym rat, uh, I love the gym each day of the week.

Speaker 2:

I have, like, different body parts. I'm also a big runner. I'm an endurance athlete, so if I'm traveling or on the road, no excuses, I can run anywhere. So I don't have any specific HIIT or CrossFit or anything like that. I love my two-mile walk at an incline, warm-up and then I go and lift weights and I love yoga on Monday nights and I like to stay active.

Speaker 1:

Nice, an incline warmup, and then I go and lift weights and I love yoga on Monday nights and just I like to stay active, nice. So when you, when you're kind of like working with your clients, do you? Do you have them kind of following the same thing, like you? Like, hey, just start off with maybe 15 minutes of activity in the morning and then spend some mindful time, or is it kind of individualized for each person?

Speaker 2:

I'd say individual is and again, as a mindset coach I'm going all in on mental programming. Habits are a part of it. But I'd say generally speaking, my clients are very athletic and pretty much already have that dialed in, so that's not really our focus.

Speaker 1:

Oh well, so then, on some of the other habits that you are helping them build with, how do you help them change or modify habits If you notice like hey, maybe they've got a couple good ones, but you know like they can improve on those. How do you go about that process of improving or changing some of the habits?

Speaker 2:

So habits, you know everybody, there's anywhere from 21 to like 200 and some odd days to build a habit. So just understand it's going to take time. So I think the big thing comes down to it's getting really clear what is it? What life do you want? What do you want to have, be, do and experience? And I'm all about.

Speaker 2:

I've started the book Atomic Habits but I've not finished it and it is just that 1% better. Because I think you know why do 92% of New Year's resolutioners fail? Because you set these big, hairy, audacious goals but you don't have systems or accountability or structure anything in place and then you're going to quit and give up a week or three weeks in because you didn't set yourself up to win. And so I think it's building good habits. So if like, don't pile on seven things at once, don't do that. Get really good at one thing. Get really good at that morning meditation or whatever, journaling, or the evening reflection How'd I do today? Get really good at one thing and then build upon that. And here's what I want to offer.

Speaker 2:

Earlier I said I offered the life assessment, same thing. So when you're looking at the major life buckets health, mental, emotional, physical, business, career, work relationships, finances and then hobbies. I've never worked with somebody that like everything sucked. There's normally like two or three of those life buckets that they're really feeling pain, but something's going well. So I really highlight that something that's going well. You already have the skill set and the mindset for quote success. Let's use that skill set and mindset in the other life areas. So it's it's finding their strengths and then their pain points and pulling it all together.

Speaker 1:

I love that. I love that Bringing them together, kind of like stacking them up and like dominoes, almost like you got the strong ones and things that you do consistently and then just kind of lean in and bring the other ones that need to be brought up, I guess who just finished.

Speaker 2:

He came to me. He was very disorganized, overwhelmed in business all over the place, been in business 18 years which I was surprised but wanting to scale but had no system structure to get him there. Plus, he was in overwhelmed, distraction, losing focus, but he was excelling in his fitness, why he had a lot of confidence. He was consistent and always showed up. So again I was showing him that, like you're already confident, consistent and have focus here, let's move that into business. And it was just drawing the line.

Speaker 1:

Very cool, very cool. I love that. So let me ask you about a little more on your business. And you work a lot one-on-one I'm guessing remotely in person. Do you travel to different events? What else is involved with your business? Is it just all?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, Sorry I cut you off, Primarily virtually. I have done some speaking engagements for corporate or small group retreats or whatever locally but yes, primarily all of my coaching is done virtually.

Speaker 1:

Cool. What kind of goals do you have for yourself and your business? I mean, we're coming up to the end of 2024. Do you have anything planned for 2025?

Speaker 2:

Somebody asked me that, like two weeks ago on LinkedIn, and he sent me a DM and he said what are you excited for for 2025? And my response was I'm still in 2024. He didn't like that. But, um, you know, like I don't, I don't have five year and 10 year goals, because time is an illusion. That's a whole nother podcast, right? So I just get really clear on what I want. I have, like, obviously, an income level that I want. I'm still always growing and challenging myself physically and doing endurance feeds. There's things I want to experience and maybe travel to and the relationship piece. So, like I just have clarity in all of my major life buckets and again, it's like those small sustainable habits. What can I do today to show up as my best self to bring those into play?

Speaker 1:

Oh, I love that and I got to ask are you, are you currently taking on new clients?

Speaker 2:

I am.

Speaker 1:

And so how do people find you just at your website, or is there other social media channels? I know you mentioned LinkedIn a second ago.

Speaker 2:

I would start on my website. It's just Heather Hakes, h-a-k-e-scom. I do offer a free call and I have tons of free resources there. I touched on the life assessment. I have a podcast, but that's the best way to start my website Heather Hakescom.

Speaker 1:

Awesome, that's sweet. Well, heather, I thank you so much for hopping on. This was awesome, a lot of value. You just ripped through a lot of different things you can share, things that people can add into their life, and I appreciate the value you're bringing in here. But before I let you roll, though, I got to ask you if you were to break it all down, all the information you've shared today and everything else that you know, what would be kind of like the cliche, what would be your number one piece of advice for somebody in the entrepreneurial world, just kind of starting off, and what would be best for them to survive that side hustle?

Speaker 2:

The big thing is in entrepreneurship, I call it personal development on steroids. You have to take on the mindset perspective that you're in it for the long game. Instant gratification, your overnight success, is not going to happen overnight. It can happen quickly. But, for example, it took me years, literally years years on LinkedIn very consistent posting, little to no engagement and then boom, overnight I did have a post go viral with 3 million views and massive engagement, but it's because I put in the rep. So it's just like running a marathon. How do you run a marathon? One step at a time, one mile at a time, one block at a time? And that's why I just that mindset piece. It's uh, you're in it for the long game, and like you have to have that passion and purpose behind it. And then I'm telling you, when you get the mindset right, the rest will follow.

Speaker 1:

Oh, wow, I love that. Well, thank you so much that's. You bring so much value into this and I really appreciate you taking the time, heather. Any last words before we roll.

Speaker 2:

No, I so appreciate you and thank you for having me.

Speaker 1:

Of course, we'll have to have you on down the road for another conversation. Thank you so much. All right guys, that's all we've got today. Peace, peace, peace peace.