Surviving the Side Hustle

Climbing New Heights: Latoya's Blueprint for Mental Health and the Power of Persistence

• Coach Rob • Season 1 • Episode 27

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Embarking on a new year can feel like standing at the foot of a mountain, but with the right goals and mindset, it's a climb we can all conquer. This episode is your sherpa, guiding you through the landscape of setting powerful intentions and understanding the tools at your disposal for enhancing your mental health. We're joined by the incredible Latoya from Toya Simone, who brings a wealth of knowledge on supporting millennial and Gen X women through creative outlets. She shares the integral role that resources like NYC Well play in providing a safety net for those facing mental health challenges, and how activities like journaling and Zumba can be a powerful force for good in our daily lives.

As we traverse the path of aspirations and relationships, Toya recounts the map she has drawn for republishing her books, offering a strategy for others to follow in their personal quests. This segment is a heart-to-heart, acknowledging the unexpected twists of life and how the support of pivotal characters like her mom and friend Carl Michel keep our compasses pointed true north. We underscore the importance of nurturing connections that uplift us and offer a touchstone of appreciation for those who've been cornerstones in our journey.

Finally, we wrap up with a rallying cry to never let the flame of perseverance flicker out. In a candid conversation, we discuss the bricks that build the road to success—consistency, self-education, and the company we keep. This episode stands as a testament to the power of pressing on and the remarkable evolution that unfolds when we do. Latoya's insights as a recreational vocational specialist serve as a beacon, proving that with each step, no matter how small, we're capable of incredible transformations.

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Speaker 1:

Hey, what's going on, guys? I got a toy on today. How are you doing? How's your new year?

Speaker 2:

First I want to say good afternoon to everyone and afternoon to you. My new year has been going well. I've been thinking about goals that I want to set and ways and I can meet those goals. So I'm still in the planning phase of the new year, but so far it's going well.

Speaker 1:

Good, yeah, no, goal setting is definitely very important and I take it super seriously. I feel like I'm constantly always planning goals. Like even before I finish goals, I'm already like planning ahead, see, like okay, what do I got to start doing next to get going, and things like that. But before we kind of dive into too much about goal setting and maybe some other things too, I would love for you to just introduce yourself to the audience and share a little bit about who you are, who you help and what do you do.

Speaker 2:

Okay, so my name is LaToya, but I do have a company called Toya Simone. Basically, the vision of the company is the Elb, manillion and Gen X women care for their mental health through creative means such as fashion and creative writing, while informing them about resources within their community. I work in the mental health field as a case manager for a few years now, and one thing that I noticed is that people who are not in the field they are unaware of the resources available to them in their own community that can assist them with their needs. So I just want to share some of those resources.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'm totally interested.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

So what kind of what resources are you talking about?

Speaker 2:

Okay. So, for example, say you're having a bad night or a bad day and you try to call your psychiatrists or your third-paste but they're not answering. You can actually get counseling through government programs and one of that program is called NYC Wells, where you can call them. You can speak to a professional there and they can help you go through that mental breakdown that you're experiencing. And also there are other like programs such as suicide outline, like if you are suicidal or if you have a friend that is suicidal, you can refer them to that suicidal outline, which is funded by government. So we have a lot of resources.

Speaker 1:

So the first one is NYC Wells.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Is that only for people who live in New York City?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's only for people who live in New York City. But there are other nationwide program and one of the program, the nationwide program. Hold on, let me try to remember, because it's a lot. I'm going to try to remember and then I will tell you later.

Speaker 1:

Yeah sure, yeah, I want to give people accurate, you know information.

Speaker 2:

So yeah, of course.

Speaker 1:

I'll just make a little note about that and we'll come back to it. So, how did you get into the field? Well, first, how did you start your business? And is that tied directly with the mental health stuff? Because it sounds kind of similar, but it also doesn't sound like it's directly related.

Speaker 2:

Okay, okay. So I got okay. So I major in psychology in college because I find it interested, because, like psychology, you're basically getting in people mind, you're getting in there in their head, you know you're trying to figure out what they're thinking.

Speaker 2:

So one of the things I forgot to mention is that at my job, I'm also recreational vocational specialist. So basically what I do is I plan activities for the clients just to elevate their mood and give them something to occupy their time. So I find that with these activities, you know, it always brings them like joy and laughter, because while we're doing these activities they're always smiling, laughing and they express their thoughts. For example, I think I remember one time I gave my client a prompt to do, which was to write about something that they're going through, but they haven't told anyone. And one of my clients said that she's currently going through depression because she doesn't have any money to pay her bills, and that's something that none of the other workers knew. But because of these creative activities that I plan for them to do, I get in their mind, I get them to say what they're thinking without actually verbalizing it, and because of that I actually share with our social worker who gets it early. They help that she needs.

Speaker 1:

So, yeah, I love that, and so what are the kind of activities do you? What are, like, the most popular activities that you do? Is it a journaling practice you were just talking about?

Speaker 2:

So yeah, that's called journaling. Yes, so we do a lot of different activities self care, bingo, self care bingo, creative writing, zumba, stuff like that to get them occupied, keep them occupied and elevate their mood.

Speaker 1:

I love that. Yeah, zumba, zumba's got to be fun too, because you get some up and moving and get some kind of like a little bit of a workout too. Bingo is just totally fun, no matter what. So I love bingo. So I love that.

Speaker 2:

And you're working to working out. So you would gravitate more towards working out Because you're all about, you know, building muscles, being physically healthy.

Speaker 1:

So now, do you ever mix it together? Do you ever do like a Zumba bingo?

Speaker 2:

No, no, but maybe. I incorporate that.

Speaker 1:

All right, 2024. There we go Zumba bingo. I love it. So what are some things that you're working towards, because you were talking about how you're kind of in that goal setting. I guess area right now you're in that phase of goal setting. What are some things that you already have that you're looking forward to working on this year 2024?

Speaker 2:

Or are you looking?

Speaker 1:

for a bigger picture.

Speaker 2:

Okay. So basically I broke down my goals so to 2024, to 2026. So these are goals that I want to achieve within this year and within the next few years. So one of my okay. So I want to be a business woman, I want to be a business owner and I want to provide wealth for me and my community, because I strongly believe that when you make it, your family and people in your community should also make it too. So one of my goals is to build better relationships with people, started with my family and then outward to my friends and then to the community, because I think that charity begins at home. So if you're not, if you're not, if you don't have a strong relationship in your home, I don't think you can have a strong relationship with friends or within the community. So my idea is to strengthen my relationships with people, but I'm going to start within my own own, within my own old school, and then extended outward. So that's one of my goals that I want to achieve for 2024. I love that.

Speaker 1:

That's. That's so awesome, Like because I totally believe. I believe it too Like you got to start home work.

Speaker 1:

I think it starts with yourself first, so make sure you have a great relationship with yourself, then building that closest people around you, and then you can just radiate outward. And before I let you dive into your next goal there because I love that that's one of your goals for this year and forward, because I have that as one of my goals as well and I was curious on what is, what's something that you're doing specifically that's going to help help deepen or strengthen those relationships. Because I'll share with you with what I'm going to do this year, but I'd like to hear what you're doing first.

Speaker 2:

Okay so. So what you said, that you got to start with yourself first, I do get, I do agree with what you're saying. But I think people are naturally people naturally care for themselves. You know, like that's just some naturally, because, yeah, people naturally love themselves. Like nobody got to tell them to love themselves, that's just not everybody, Because I feel like some people yeah, most people.

Speaker 2:

But to answer your question, what I'm doing is I remember one of my friends, my close friend. We had a conflict. I'm not going to hear the conflict and what she wanted me to do. She wanted me to like communicate with her more During the week, like text her, call her more during the week and I'm like why? Like, we're both busy, we're both working women I'm I have a business that I'm trying to get up and build. You know, I'm trying to build this empire, like I got time for that.

Speaker 2:

But then I realized that when it comes to relationship, it's all about give and take. You know, like, I got the, I got the gift and I also want to receive. And when you're in a like, whatever the relationship is, whether it's romantic or friendship or, you know, just family relationship you got to listen to the other person and what they need, just as all, and try to implement that and provide them with what their need is, just as all. If you communicate to someone that you have a relationship with, whether it's friendship, romantic or just family relationship you want them to listen to you and you want them to, if it's possible, provide that thing that you need. So I realized that what she said was very valid.

Speaker 2:

So, this year, what I'm going to do, I'm going to reach out more to the people within my life. Like I don't I don't like to call people, I'm a writer, so I rather text the person. So I'm going to like, like you know, I hope everything is okay, I hope you enjoy your day. So I'm going to reach out to people more because, as I said, you know what she said was was very valid, and I want people to consider my feelings, you know. So I'm going to consider her feeling. So, yes, I'm going to reach out to people more and, yeah, that's one of the ways I'm going to build stronger relationship and I'm going to assist people with their goal. Like, if I know that someone is doing something and I have the resource and I have the talent and gift to assist them to fulfilling that goal, I'm going to volunteer my time, I'm going to volunteer my gifts and my talents to help them fulfill that goal. So I'm going to, so I'm going to Be the type of friend that I want people to be to me.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I think that's, I think that's perfect and I think that's so wonderful and I love it because checking in on everybody and making sure, that you keep that strong communication with people that you want to build these relationships is so strong and it's everybody gets so caught up in their everyday life and it's it's sometimes you forget, sometimes you can feel really lonely. So I imagine that the people that you reach out to just to say, hey, I'm still here, I hope your days going well. I imagine that that helps them out a lot. And the second part there you do just basically saying you just be a good friend, show up for people when they need you, and I feel like that's another huge thing that people tend to overlook just just showing up and that really makes a big difference for people. I love that.

Speaker 2:

I think. I Think that you know we're all humans, you know we made mistakes, but as long as we grow you know, learn from those mistakes and grow you know and treat people all you want to be treated because, as I said, I want my friends to show up for me, so I got to show up for them, so I'm gonna, I'm gonna give out what I want, you know, cuz the Bible said that you read what you sow, so I'm gonna give give out what I want to read.

Speaker 1:

He read, so yeah speaking of which, thank you so much for taking the time to hop on today. I appreciate you making the time out of your busy day to share a little bit of value with my audience.

Speaker 2:

You're welcome.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and and and like. Building the relationships really is so powerful, because I Mean it's very cliche to say, but you're everyone's always talking about it how your, your, your network is your net worth. So the stronger relationships you have, the more relations you have, more positive people, the better. Better life is, better business becomes, better Relationships are all around, so I love that there. So what are some other goals you got for the year?

Speaker 2:

Okay, um. So my other goal is I want to do a second edition of my book. I wrote two books Um. One of the book is called us Story of struggles or break in victories. I wish I had a physical copy because I stole out. Congratulations thank you, but I recently ordered some more copies from Amazon, so I'm gonna, once I get those copies, I'm hopefully I get, hopefully I sell out quicker.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So I want to do a second edition of that book. I want to make it better. Well, I want to do a second edition of both books. I want to. I want to make them better, I want to make them more valuable, because I think that, whatever you do, so I want to improve the value of the book, I want to make it more valuable, so I'm gonna do a second edition of those books.

Speaker 1:

Yes, that's gotta be pretty. And I mean I haven't written any books but I know we both have a bunch of mutual friends who have written a couple books. But it's a lot of work. So how are you planning on tackling both second editions this year?

Speaker 2:

Oh, okay, so I broke it down. So what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna start in March, because March is my birthday.

Speaker 1:

So oh yeah, Happy early birthday.

Speaker 2:

Thank you. So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna focus on Writing us first, which is the best seller, shot out to car Michelle, because he helped me to write that book, because I didn't know what I was doing.

Speaker 2:

I was like so he assists me by Helping me to go through the process, like this is step one, this is what you need to do. This is step two. This is step three. So shout out to car Michelle. Um, I knew for what five years he assists me and I'm like okay, so I'm gonna start in March.

Speaker 2:

I'm gonna start with the book us, the best seller book, and Each night I'm gonna come home. I'm going to wait first. First, I'm gonna reread my own book and I'm gonna edit. I'm gonna edit it, self edit, and I'm gonna Say what poem or what, what code I want to take out or what else, what new poetry I have that I want to input in the book. And Once I start there in the second step is that I'm gonna start to edit the manual graph and each night when I come home from work, I'm gonna work on it for like one hour until this summer, which should be when they book should, when the second edition should be finished. So I'm gonna read it working and edited, and Schedule one hour each day to to re.

Speaker 2:

To rewrite it. Well, I'm not rewrite it, but edit it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I love that it's I'm very organized and you got a great plan of attack and I love that you got. The goal is you've got action steps. You know where you're going with this and so let me ask you how do you, how do you handle any kind of like Twists or turns? What happens if something pops up and you can't get to it and it gets pushed back? How do you, how do you stay organized when things get chaotic?

Speaker 2:

That's a good question. So me that's a very good question. I mean I can't control anything. Well, most things I can't control. So if I can control something I would try to resolve it.

Speaker 2:

But say something pop-up that is more important than the book, for example, a family issue that arise. Of course that family issue is going to be more important than finishing the second edition of the book in the summer. So I will the paradise that family issue over the book. So it depends on how important the issue is that arise. If it's like something minor or basic that can be resolved in one minute, I'm not going to pay it in the mind. I probably ask my mom to help me Shout out to my mom because she does a lot Shout out to my mom. So if it's something minor, I would probably ask my mom to help me. But if it's something that is urgent and that require a lot of my time and is more important than the book, I won't feel bad for delaying publishing the second edition because there are certain things that come first. So it all depends Family. I will take care of the family issue and delay the publication. So it depends on how important it is.

Speaker 1:

That was such a perfect answer too, because I feel like I'm constantly trying to remind others that when things do go, I don't want to say wrong, but when things don't go as planned, calm things down. Control what you can control and many times there are a lot of things that happen that we can't control but you can always control how you react and how your emotions are, and I love that you said if it's family, family comes first. You got your priorities in line and you know exactly what takes president over what, and that was perfect there. And you mentioned your mom and I wanted to ask you I'm guessing your mom is a great role model or a mentor or somebody that you look up to, but do you have any other mentors teachers other than Carl as well, that you kind of look up to?

Speaker 2:

No, no. The funny thing is like I didn't have any role models growing up. I always felt like alone I know that's the right word. I just felt like there wasn't any people that I could count on growing up except my parents. And parents made mistake and you have issue with your parents. They made mistake, but I don't feel like outside of that, I don't feel like I had anyone who was really there. So role models no, I know what that is, so yeah.

Speaker 1:

Well, it sounds like your parents did a pretty good job, because you're very driven Sounds like you've got things, you got your goals, you've got your vision, you've got action items, so you're well put together. I know myself, growing up I reflected a lot of athletes. I wanted to make sure that my body was looking the best, it was moving the best, performing the best for a lot of different sports. So professional athletes kind of became like a role model type thing and then as I've kind of progressed through my career and kind of grown a little bit, my personal role models and mentors became certain coaches that I would start to hire, like business coaches and speaking coaches and just of the sort like that. So I know I'm always looking to kind of make sure that I continue to level myself up, but I'm always looking for people who have what I want to have. That's what I try to reflect off of what they're doing, that kind of thing.

Speaker 2:

Okay. And the thing with goal is you always have to have an action plan because, like, you can't have a goal and don't have an action plan, like what are the steps that you're gonna take to make this goal come to pass? What are the steps that you're gonna take to make to achieve this goal? So you can't have a goal without an action plan and without an end date because, like, that's unrealistic. You gotta put some actions towards it. Like me, when I said that I wanna build better relationship and nurture relationship, my action plan is A. I'm gonna assist people with their goal, like A do you need me to assist you with this? I have the skill, I have the resources. That's one of my action plan. My next action plan I'm gonna reach out to people, like twice a month just to check in on them. A are you doing a op? Your, well, so you gotta have action plan if you're gonna, actually, if you're goal Like oh yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's perfect right there, because without actions, without the action plan, I feel like the goal is just a dream. It's not very tangible. But once you put the action steps out and you have it, you can see the path and then, all of a sudden, your goal has become achievable. Right, but then you have to put the work in, just like you said, like actually reaching out and making sure that you touch base with people, and you gotta stay consistent with it too, right? Can't just be-.

Speaker 1:

Yes, consistency you gotta just do it every once in a while. You gotta be day in and day out.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, consistency. So, yeah, very, very much consistency. Make a to-do list, you know, post it on somewhere that you can see, like, for example, at work. Most of the time I write a to-do list and put it on my computer or on the phone. So when I go to work I know what I gotta do, so I don't gotta be sitting there and be like what should I do today? You know, like I already planned the day before and what I'm gonna do. Even with my personal business, I planned the weekend, what I wanna do within that week. And me, as you said, I'm very driven, like I want to. I want, at the end of the day, I check off the things that I was able to complete that day. So my to-do list keep me focused. It keep me grounded. It said these are the things that I need to do each day in order to achieve this goal or this mission.

Speaker 1:

So yeah, yeah, so yeah, I love that Checking off the to-do list. It feels good and you get that sense of accomplishment and it's no mystery that you have such a great skill set for getting organized and planning ahead and setting those goals and action plans. I'm gonna ask it, Flip side of that how often are you doing reflection? How often do you look back and check in and do you do a lot of journaling yourself or do you just do that with clients?

Speaker 2:

Okay, so one thing my father taught me when I was younger, but I didn't listen to him, because when we're younger, we think we know everything.

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah.

Speaker 2:

My father always said you need to reflect. I'm like sit down, reflect. What did you do? What did you do wrong? What lesson did you learn from this mistake? How can you do better next time? My father taught me that but I didn't listen.

Speaker 2:

Recently I am in therapy, and because I have to keep a journal for a therapy I wanna use that word, because I have to keep a journal for a therapy that kind of made me reflect. So I'm supposed to write a journal every week. So because I have to write in that journal every week, I get to reflect on what went wrong. What part did I play in that incident? How could that angle it better? So because of that therapy, I reflect regularly, compared to when I was younger, which I didn't use to reflect. I just used to go through life Like lalalala, like even when things was falling apart. That's how I went through life when I was younger. But now I'm older and I'm on this healing journey. I'm on this journey to evolve and to become better. I find myself reflecting more and reaching out to people, professionals, who can assist me in my healing journey and becoming a better person.

Speaker 2:

So, I journal regularly.

Speaker 1:

I love that and that kind of goes hand in hand with my action steps for this year on building deeper relationships. Because I got into practicing gratitude a couple of years ago and I think I'm at like 400 days in a row or something writing in my gratitude journal, but that's what I was. I would try to do three things that I'm grateful for, and just it could be anything. It could be just because of breathing, because I have a cell phone, because my best friends or whatever it might be, just write those down and I was doing that for so long. And that's good because it keeps me in the positive state and reminds me of counting my blessings, of everything that I have. And because this year I really wanted to push and deepen a lot of relationships with people.

Speaker 1:

I'm trying to every single day send out a gratitude text to somebody that I haven't really talked to in a while and that gives me an opportunity to continue the reflection on myself, on the great things that I have, then also show appreciation for somebody else, for something great that they've done and contributed to in my life, gives me a chance to just write out a quick little text message, kind of go into it, and then that helps front in their day, or at least I'd like to think it helps brighten their day a little bit. Then also it opens the conversation for hey, how have you been? What's going on? I haven't talked to you in a while and I feel like that's a good way of sharing that reflection practice and sharing positivity all around.

Speaker 2:

Mm-hmm and I'm. No, I do imagine that probably like elevate their mood because they got a random text, so that probably be like oh, and it's a gratitude text, You're not asking for anything. So they might be like whoa, he texts me on the front, he's not asking for anything, he's just saying thank you, and people like to be appreciated. I remember one of my supervisor. He usually does something for us and so I would always say, oh, thank you for doing X, Y and Z, and even on this, when I know that you don't want to do it, because I always show him that gratitude. He does it because people like to be appreciated, so that I think that right in their day, everyone likes to be appreciated.

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah, everyone loves a little attention. Yeah, I feel like we don't get enough of it, so I feel like that's great.

Speaker 2:

Oh, and back to your question. The first question you asked me was for resources for people with mental illness. Well, not our people who are struggling, whether we suicidal, taught or some mental crisis. The national, the national center or resource is called Sam age. So it's as in Sam, as an apple M, as in mother age, as in house, as as in Sam, a National outlines so they can call, is open 24, seven. They can call and speak to a professional and that professional will guide them through that crisis.

Speaker 1:

So what? So what kind of defines as a crisis could it be? Does it have to be someone who's in a suicidal situation or like? Could it be something as like a rough relationship kind of breakup kind of thing, or something going terrible with business? What kind of constitutes it as a crisis?

Speaker 2:

Okay so I recently learned this in therapy that not you shouldn't because, like, how not to say this? Okay so I recently learned this is in therapy you shouldn't minimize what you're going with. You know so. But a crisis could be anything suicidal. If you're feeling suicidal, you know, go to the emergency room. Use the suicidal outline. That's why it was created. The suicidal outline was created to help people.

Speaker 2:

If you're going through a bad day and you need someone to speak to you, you feel like you don't have anyone to speak to call. Call these online. Call New York, Call NYC Wells, call Sam HSA. Call these people. They're there to assist you. So a crisis in is anything that makes you feel overwhelmed. Crisis is anything that makes you feel broken or like you don't want to go on anymore. So I can't really define what a crisis is for for everyone, because everyone problem is important, Like you might have me, like I might have the same problem as you and I'd be like, oh, whatever, but to you that problem is breaking you. That that problem is. It makes you feel like you can't go on. So it's not up to me to say that's not a problem. You know it's a problem for you. So if you feel like you're being broken, if you feel like you don't want to go on anymore. You know, call these, these online, use these resources.

Speaker 1:

Wow, yeah. Yeah, that's so true, because you never really know what someone's going through and how it's affecting them in that given given situation or day. So we all, we all, we all interpret and see things differently. So, yeah, definitely some very powerful things.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you cannot minimize other. You cannot minimize other people problem. You just can't do that, you know, because they might be falling apart. So yeah, very true.

Speaker 1:

So I do want to be Curtis of your time. What do you got going on in the business world right now for yourself? You gotta? Where can people kind of contact you or find out more information you got?

Speaker 2:

Okay. So I do have a website called toya Simonecom. That's T as in talent, or as in octopus, y as in yo yo, a as in Apple, s as in Sam I as in Igloo, m as in mother, or as in octopus and as in Nancy, e as in elephantcom. So you can check out my website. I do have some beautiful dresses for women. So go, go, go, check it out, go shop, because what I do realize is that fashion does just does play a lot in your mental state, because whenever you put on a nice outfit or a nice dress, it always elevate your mood. You always feel better, like if you're kind of down, when you put on something that look nice and you look in the mirror, you be like, dang, I look good, you know. So it's, fashion tends to elevate your mood. So, yeah, go and check out my website and you can follow me on Instagram at toya Simone 77.

Speaker 1:

Toya Simone 77 on Instagram and yeah, I love that so much too because really big believer in looking good. Once you look good, you can, you feel good and you can do great things. So that's really some great stuff. So, before I let you go though, boiling it all down, you've got your got your business. You've got you got your work that you're doing in the mental health world and everything. So you're you're juggling the side hustle and growing your empire.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

Coming to you as somebody. If I were to come to you as a new entrepreneur starting out in the side hustle, what would be your number one piece of advice in order for me to survive the side hustle?

Speaker 2:

I would say don't give up. I think I learned that lesson in 2023, not to give up. I know it's easier said than done, but that's one of the lessons that I learned Don't give up. Is it going to be easy? It wasn't easy for anyone, but I think we consistency and determination and knowledge. You can achieve anything. So don't give up. Self educate, don't wait on your boss to teach you anything. Read, read, read, read, read like read books. Find friends whose vision aligns with your vision and who can encourage you and push you through when you're having discouragement. So don't give up. That's my, that's my number one advice. Don't give up, just keep going, yeah love that.

Speaker 1:

Thank you so much and I again I appreciate you taking the time coming on today. You gave so much value, plenty of resources. You just listed off like 10 different things that you can do. That just keep getting better and growing and I appreciate you and I appreciate our friendship and I'd love to have you back on the show in the future and to kind of check in see what you're up to then. But for now it's been a pleasure. We'll talk to you soon.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, bye Ross.